Dealing with disbelief

I really hate that I have to write this post but it needs to be done. Most clubbies live in a world where they are the only one in their circle of friends born with a deformity. Now that is a good thing on so many levels but it is a bad thing that can rear its ugly head. The good sides are simple, they make you feel normal and included in this crazy world.

The bad things are a bit tricky. No matter what the non-clubbie friends or friends without a deformity will never truly be able to relate with you in regards to what you are going through. Sure the good ones try, the bad ones fake it.

In my own experience I really hate to be reminded that there are things that I cannot do. So the concept of asking for help is really difficult for as is accepting help. I do appreciate offers because that means a bit more than "I'm sorry" and the ever dreaded "I hope you get better". The reason I say that one is dreaded is because there really is no such thing until the day that bionic feet are invented. When I hear that or the variants of it like "feel better", I cringe because that honestly means that they have no grasp of the concept that once you start having symptoms, you never really stop having them. Has this cost me many friends, you bet ya. Is it harsh, to me no, because most of my friends have been around me for years, they should know better.

The thing that I will not tolerate at all is disbelief. A lot of people will disbelieve clubbies at first because we look normal usually and carry on like nothing is wrong. So disbelief usually happens to ones that haven't known me very long and they won't be any closer than vague acquaintances that I never think of fondly. The reason is because what I go through on bad days is something that I wouldn't even wish on the devil himself. So to have people disbelieve me is a severe blow to me.

For example, I have recently lost a few friends due to disbelief, one was a friend for nearly 10 years and others I had known for a few months to a couple of years. I don't honestly have time to go into the details but suffice it to say not a one of them knew/know what I am going through right now with my feet. They do not know that I am possibly facing surgery due to a subluxation of my peroneal tendon of my left ankle. They do not know anything about angles of regression and what that actually means. So to paraphrase one of them  who said I was "full of shit", think what you want but I hope you, your children or grandchildren never have to experience what I am going through.

The past two weeks have been rough for me. I am still recovering from a stress fracture in my left 3rd metatarsal and in a cam boot. Last Monday morning I woke up and thought that my worst nightmare was coming true, pain, unbelievable pain in my right foot (the more severely affected foot). I couldn't walk, the best thing I could think was to try some deep breathing techniques to calm down a bit then wake my boyfriend up. When I tried to get out of bed I couldn't walk, not even the roughly 4 paces to the bathroom. So I called out of work and then got an appointment with my podiatrist. He then diagnosed me with severe anterior tibial tendonitis with moderate joint inflammation. He prescribed me 2 NSAID's (oral and topical) and gave me very strict orders. Those being: 90% of my day must be either sitting or laying down, no driving at all, and no work for the rest of the week. Simple yes but some people, no matter what you do or say will always take things out of context and twist them (take a look at Fox News, they make millions off that).

So here I sit on a Friday night, knowing that support can be very hard to find. Those true friends who stand by you and vise versa are rare indeed. So to you out there be it parents of clubbies, spouse/boyfriend/significant other of clubbies, friends of clubbies, and most of all the lucky clubbies who do not have problems as an adult, look to those clubbies who struggle with pain every day to show you how to treat them. Be mindful that we in constant pain have very little tolerance for B/S in all forms because we cherish those wonderful moments where there is minimal pain or no pain. If you happen to start something with us during those bad days, we may lash out and honestly not have a clue what is going on.

To those uncaring disbelievers, please kindly sod off!!

Selecting a service dog

When selecting a service dog the best advice I can give to prospective owners is to make sure that dog fits your lifestyle. When I say lifestyle I mean making sure that the dog has a relatively easy transition into your life. If you are a neat freak then a Bloodhound just won't do because of the drool. If you like things just so then a Hamiltonstovare just won't work as they have a sense of humor that is all their own.

For a service dog it is a multi-step issue. You have to think what I want that dog to do for me. If you want a balance dog then you need something that is at least medium sized or bigger, so that the animal can stand being pressed on. If you want something that will help you pick up items off the floor then a breed that is highly obedient, quick to learn new things and have a larger more sturdy mouth is required. For clubbies most of us need balance, support, and/or retrieval aids. There is the pain detection aspect and right now, I am just trying to find out how Alice does it so it can be trained to future service dogs.

For balance/support dogs, show training helps by leaps and bounds. Conformation show training specifically trains a dog to stand in a certain position that is most natural for them, at very long periods of time without moving, no matter what. Balance aids need to stand still and allow their owner to nearly dangle off of them, so a retired show dog just might be your best option. I would contact a breed parent club who should be able to refer you do a breeder(s) that might have the right dog for you.

Here is a list of breeds that could work well for clubbies and a brief reason why:

Hamiltonstovare - they are extremely in-tune to their owners, love to pose in positions and hold them, have endurance in spades, are relatively health problem free and have great longevity with some living well into their teens
Doberman Pinscher - they are incredibly versatile and bond closely to their people, bred properly they can be long-lived and very loyal
Great Dane - they naturally lean and have great size, some can be in-tune to their owner, however their lifespan isn't that great
American Pit Bull Terrier/American Staffordshire Terrier - they may get a bad reputation but they are very intelligent, loyal, have endurance and strength galore, make sure to obtain one from a responsible breeder who regularly health tests
Harrier - they are incredibly rare but really tune into their people, they are relatively health problem free and tend to have a ton of endurance (some have been successful Autism service dogs as well)
Rottweiler - bred properly they can do just about anything you ask them to, but you must have a firm hand and are not suitable for first time dog owners
Portuguese Water Dog - another versatile breed but the maintenance on their coat can be a big issue. The breed parent club is one of the best in America regarding referrals and health testing and the breed might do well for allergy sufferers. 
Pointer - most pointing breeds are bred to hold a position and do it from a very young age, they have great noses, endurance, and bred properly can be long-lived and relatively health problem free, they do have a higher energy level so be careful in selecting a puppy, avoid the bounding puppy and select the calmer ones

I do not generally recommend the more common service dog breeds because of the health problem issue. Yes Goldens and Labs make amazing service dogs but they can have some really major health issues, like hip/elbow displaysia, cancers, eye problems, sudden cardiac issues. I would tend to avoid the German Shepherds, Belgian Shepherds and Dutch Shepherds because most clubbies need a dog that doesn't have that much energy to burn, these breeds make great police breeds and service dogs but they are generally better suited to guide dogs and extremely active people.

Notice that I listed breeds that traditionally are working dogs or hounds and that is because when you give these breeds a job, they view it as that, a job. They make the transition from family pet to service dog very well because they see it as going to work.

Regarding pain detection dogs, you must have a close bond in order for your dog to pick on the subtle clues so choosing a breed that is naturally more tuned in to their owners is a must.

In regards to mixed breeds, doodles, designer mixes, and shelter dogs, be careful. While I do not support the doodle breeds or designer mixes in general because they tend to be more money driven instead of health/improving a breed driven, some can work as a service dog. The temperaments of mixed breeds are untested and unless you plan to train your dog from a very young age (4 weeks old) to hold a position then a purebred from a show breeder might be the better option. I would adopt a dog from a shelter as a family pet but for a service dog there are just too many variables.

If you have any questions regarding other breeds, don't hesitate to ask.

The Great Wal-Mart Menace

Since I have taken Alice out some people have asked me which is the best and which is the worst. Well since I have what is known as a silent disability, meaning that outwardly I look normal and do not have a visible disability like a wheelchair, cane, limbs amputated, etc some people wonder why I need her and can get rather pushy and/or hostile towards us.

The best places that I have found for us have been Target and GameStop. Each time I go in there the associates are friendly, treat me like a normal person and either let Alice do her job or just acknowledge that she is there and move on. A few people ask us what type of dog she is and that is fine, I do my little Meet the Breeds speech and move on. Another great place is IKEA, we went up to the closest IKEA to myself at the end of June while we were on our way to pick up my newest Hamiltonstovare from the airport. We chose IKEA because Hamiltonstovare are a Swedish breed and it isn't every day that I get to show off so much Swedish pride as taking a Hamiltonstovare to IKEA. The associates at IKEA were great, didn't know what she was, but great. We had fun looking around all the various things and generally had a good time.

The worst place by far to go with a service dog that I have found is Wal-Mart, hence the title of this blog. Now I usually avoid Wal-Mart in general just because I don't like their policies on their workers and other things. However, I do go there for prescriptions. The first time I took her to a Wal-Mart we were scared, I mean absolutely terrified by the associates. Alice has a bright red harness on and an ID badge that explains her qualifications and mine, per the ADA I qualify and there is nothing that any person can say about it. Alice performs a job for me that makes my life easier and has been specially trained to do so.

Our first trip to Wal-Mart was to pick a few grocery items and a prescription, then go home. While on our way to the grocery section an associate asked me if she was a service dog. I responded that she was and he said in a very bitter way "Well it better be, because we don't allow dogs here...." First off, she is a living breathing thing with a gender of female, calling my dog an "it" is a surefire way to get my blood boiling. Next off, the red harness and badge are a clue that she is a service dog. To have a dog in a service dog vest/harness that is not a service dog is a federal crime. So I guess that associate thought I was committing a federal crime for kicks, nope, not my style. After we were finished in the grocery section we made the long walk to the pharmacy section, during that time several customers openly glared at me and the associates pointed and stared. So after I paid for my purchases, we promptly left, rather shaken up because I'm not used to being pointed at.

The next time I went to Wal-Mart with Alice was yesterday. I have a stress fracture on my left foot and have unfortunately developed severe tendonitis in my right foot. So I really cannot walk very well without being in pain. So taking Alice with me was a must. I was able to sit with Alice acting as my walking ottoman (her body heat acts as instant heat therapy too) while my boyfriend stood in line. Notice I said that there were no seating areas in line, there were outside of the line. So if someone with a disability sits on a bench near the line but not in it, they will not be served at all. We got to the counter and there was some confusion over a coupon for one of my pain medications, I didn't see the issue, my podiatrist gave it to me some 20 minutes before. So, we stand and we stand and we stand while they give us no indication of what the issue is. Finally to try and speed the process along my boyfriend asks another cashier if she would give us some bags so we may bag up the other items that had already been rung up while we wait. She got really snarky with us about waiting until the cashier got back for her to bag things up. I guess she doesn't expect to see a 25 year old with a service dog going slightly green from pain. What should have been a 10 minute or less time at the counter turned into 25 minutes. By the time I got in my car I was nauseated from pain with tears pooling in my eyes from the pain.

So avoid the great Wal-Mart menace if you can dear clubbies because from my experience that they have no idea what a silent disability is.

Why Hamiltonstovare?

The most common question I get is why this breed and not any other breed? Well the simple answer is I love how they look, to me there is nothing more beautiful than seeing a Hamiltonstovare bounding in snow. The other more educated answer is this breed best suits my lifestyle. Hamiltonstovare are NOT for everybody and to all those clubbies out there, just because a Hamilton works for this clubbie that does not mean they will work for you. Hamiltons are hounds and they have a VERY high prey drive, if you have small animals such as rats, ferrets, guinea pigs, mice and of course rabbits, a Hamilton simply will not work for you. If you have cats, it can happen but it depends on the cat more than the hound. I have 2 cats, one is a kitten and adores the dogs, the other is 6 years old and hides from them. The one thing I know is that my hounds would never purposely hurt the cats, they may injure them in excitement or in play but never injure or kill them on purpose.

Hamiltons make the transition to a service dog very easily depending on the work asked. Hamiltons make great balance/support dogs, especially if they are show trained. Dog show training helps in balance/support dog training because a well trained show dog should not move when it is examined, the same rule applies to a balance/support dog, they should not move when they are helping their owners up. Hamiltons are one of the more perceptive hound breeds and can easily sense when there is something wrong. That comes from how the breed was developed, they were bred to go out and hunt during the day with the men and come home at night and assist the women in household tasks at night. Some service dogs have to be taught to be attached at your side, Hamiltons naturally do that with their people. Hamiltons love being with their people at all times which makes them adaptable too. Most Hamiltons take everything in their stride as long as their owners do the same.

Hamiltonstovare are classified as a medium to large breed, which makes them ideal for the rigors of being pressed on by adult people as a balance/support dog. Hamiltons do not make good apartment dogs as they can be loud and they need at least a good 20-30 minutes of running every day. Hamiltonstovare are really known for their sense of smell, so any type of work involving their nose is perfect for them. Tracking suits them well as does any sort of scent alert work. To those who have scent triggered asthma and want an alert dog, a Hamilton just might be your ideal choice.

Training is the interesting part with Hamiltons as it can be easy or it can be smooth and perfect. Alice is a master of tricks before dinner time but if I ask her to do those same things with a dog show lead around her neck, forget it, she won't do it. She knows when it is time to play and when it isn't. She is the same way when I put the service harness on her, she will stick to me like glue when that is on. Training a Hamilton works best if you have a sense of humor, patience in spades and a never ending treat supply. The one thing to remember is to keep things fun with them, like all scent hounds you never want to be too forceful as the fun is gone and then they won't work for you.

How can she help me??

The idea for a service dog came about after my second foot fracture in under 5 years. I started to get increased weakness, grinding ankle pain and tendon weakness. The big change for me was noticing my limits changing. When I was younger, I could walk around a mall for several hours, like most American teenagers, with minimal pain. I also played soccer, softball and basketball. My other passion than dogs is music and I marched in my high school marching band for 4 years. That was when the first difficulties started, my ankles just couldn't move as smoothly as everyone else and because of it, I was constantly out of step. So after several tear-filled nights with my mother and my mother making a few angry calls to my band director, he and I thought of a novel way to create the illusion that I was in step, I marched next to a bass drummer and slightly anticipated each step. So with a ton of practice I became one of the better marchers in band, quite a an accomplishment for somebody's ankles refused to make some of the angles required for marching.

So after I broke my foot the second time, my wonderful dog pushed me down the stairs the night of the last Harry Potter midnight showing, I knew some things were only going to get worse. I then kicked around the idea of training my Hamilton, Alice, to earn her CGC (Canine Good Citizen) title. The CGC is a title offered by the AKC that demonstrates that your dog is a good member of society and is a prerequisite for most service dogs and nearly all therapy dogs. The first time Alice was tested, she failed 2 tests out of 10 so we worked on those things which were sitting on command and holding that sit. That is a struggle for any show dog because most show dog people do not teach their dogs to sit for fear that they will sit in the ring, then all hopes of that ribbon are lost. I trusted Alice to know the difference and just went with training her every day. Finally, at a show they offered CGC testing so I marched Alice up there and she passed 10 out of 10 tests so new CGC!!! YAY!!! That made everybody around proud as that made Alice the first ever Hamiltonstovare to have any AKC title and the first ever CGC title for a Hamiltonstovare. That was a proud day.

After that I started to put the pieces together to figure out what she could do for me while I was recovering from wrist surgery. I taught Alice to stand still, no matter how much pressure was put on her, so I could brace against her when getting off of the floor. Then she told me that she could do something for me. During one of our walks around the neighborhood, I noticed that after about 45 minutes she would take her muzzle and nudge my thigh or hand. I didn't think anything of it until the pain started. She was basically telling me "we need to go home because your limit is coming up..." Now I have no idea how she can sense this but I think it has something to do with the combination of change in my gait and maybe even subtle changes in my body chemistry that she can smell. The only reason I say the last one is her weird habit that she has done since I got her, she checks my breath. I know it sounds weird but she does it. So now that I know what she can do, it is adventure time (we like adventures in my house as Alice's formal name is UKC Ch. Kilcavan Alice's Adventures CGC)!!!

The Beginning

Everything needs a start so I will start. The purpose of this blog is to inform people about service dogs from my own personal journey from the start of my need all the way to the end result of a fully fledged service dog. 

First off, I was born on December 7, 1986 in Norfolk, Va with a congenital form of bilateral club feet, also known as Congenital Talipes Equinovarus. I was born otherwise healthy and normal. From the time I was born I had a specialist who looked after my feet. His name is Dr. H Sheldon St. Clair, he is still practicing in the Tidewater area and is affiliated with the CHKD (Children's Hospital of the King's Daughters). My parents did every form of correction that was recommended, I went through casting, shoes and when that didn't work, corrective surgery on my right foot, all before I was a year old. As I grew up, I knew I was different from most kids because most kids didn't see an orthopedic surgeon on a regular basis, nor were most kids told to be extra careful with my feet. By the time I was 7 or 8, I knew and had a firm understanding of club feet. I was still being seen regularly by my doctor and was an extremely cooperative x-ray patient. As I grew up, I was fitted for orthotic inserts and still told to limit myself and never push my feet too hard. The problem was, around the time I was fitted for orthotics was around the same time I found my true passion in life, dog shows. 

I started off showing Beagles and loved every minute of it, from then I moved to various other breeds such as Great Danes and Clumber Spaniels. While I showed I also harbored a love for a wonderful breed called the Hamiltonstovare. I learned everything I could about them, who bred them, show records, pedigrees, everything (in English) that I could find. My love for Hamiltons was so much that when I entered my freshman year at Old Dominion University, I told my parents that as a college graduation present I wanted a breeding pair of Hamiltonstovare. Little did I know where that would get me. At that time I started contacting various breeders, some were supportive, others seemed lack-luster and only sent a response and left it at that. It was only toward the end of my college career that I started contact with my dogs' breeder. She took me under her wing and made sure that I knew my stuff regarding structure, showmanship, breeding, care and health all well before my Hamilton was a glimmer in my eye. I still thought that my Hamilton was 5-10 years away at most, but little did I know just 18 months after I received my diploma that I would picking up my very own Hamilton from the airport. 

This whole time I thought of obtaining a Hamilton as just a pet and show dog, with the hopes of starting my own line in the future. The thought of a service dog never crossed my mind, mainly because my feet were only a mild irritation half the time and not something that would cause so many problems. Oh how fate works sometimes....

Alice on her way home from the airport